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Look carefully, things aren't always the way they appear.

Look carefully, things aren't always the way they appear.

There is a beautiful half moon tonight, but every time I try to get a picture of it, it turns into a bright orb. I understand the technical reasons why, but it feels oddly emblematic of the situation I find myself in today. 

It is no secret I have been going through a bit of a rough patch lately. My depression has reared its head again with a vengeance. My brother is in the hospital very sick  To make everything so much better, my mother has been pointing out my many faults as a son and a brother. It all compounds on itself to make for a very emotionally blue time. 

Underneath all of that is how wonderful my friends and my creativity have been at this time. People have been nicer to me than I feel I deserve., but does anyone really deserve to be treated well?  Is that something a person can deserve?  No. 

Everyone, regardless of circumstances should just be treated well. So, when my mind tells me I don't deserve to be treated well that is a lie. It is how things should be for everyone. 

So accept good things that come your way, and never believe that you deserve the good or the bad. Life comes to us all in a delicious randomness. Smile and the good, and laugh at the bad. Nothing lasts forever. 

Thank you to everyone who reminded me of this. You are my everything. 

Sitting under the trees at Indian Hills Winery.

Sitting under the trees at Indian Hills Winery.

I am a bit concerned by the name of the place. A bunch of white people owning Indian Hills just feels wrong. 

I wish I could taste the wines, but I can't have alcohol for a couple weeks, so that leaves me out 

I really don't feel that good today. It is another blue day. I just hopeBrian is having fun. 

The Lightning did a number on the trees.

The Lightning did a number on the trees.

Luckily, the only casually was the Internet, of course. So, I will be stuck with LTE until they get a truck out here, but it could have been a lot worse. 

That lightning strike was close to the house.

That lightning strike was close to the house.

The lights flickered off and on, and the noise was deafening.  Not to mention how bright it was. Wow, just wow. 

I was just about to upload the podcast, so of course the Internet goes out.

I was just about to upload the podcast, so of course the Internet goes out.

Everyday this week New Wave has gone down hard, and unfortunately they are the only real game in town because monopolies are legal now...

I just want the service I pay for and refunds for all the time they are down. Why should I pay for a service that just doesn't work???

Sorry to rant, but this has been happening way too much. 

Sitting with a synopsis to be blended into the new story.

Sitting with a synopsis to be blended into the new story.

I've had this outline sitting around for a while, and I even wrote a few drafts of the opening chapter a couple times, but there always felt like there was something missing.  Now I know what that something is, and I need to redraft the outline to fit into the new story.  I am not sure how much will make it through the rework, but I am pretty sure the basic contours of the story will survive.

I am so excited.  I've wanted to tell this story for a long, long time.  There is a lot of work ahead, but I can't wait to get into it.

The rain is slowing us down a bit.

The rain is slowing us down a bit.

Earlier it felt more like we were is a boat than in a car. 

It is such a beautiful day for... Shopping?

It is such a beautiful day for... Shopping?

o no, not me. I may be sitting in the car listening to Madonna, but at least I am having fun and relaxing. There are so many people that just don't know how to relax. 

The area has been so gentrified there really isn't anything much to do anymore. Yuppies and Hipstera ruin all things in time. It's like they are the real white walkers and winter is here.